InsaneJournal

Current mood:

scared

Freaked out
Ok, so I never want to sleep again. I think I just had an episode of sleep paralysis. Honestly.


I was just starting to get comfy and fall asleep, then I got a bit of vision disturbance with my eyes closed (like you sometimes get when you have a migraine) then tried to open my eyes. They started to flutter for a few seconds, then I could open them. Then I tried to reach my hand up to rub over my eyes and I couldn't move, from the neck down. My body started to feel really flushed (though this may have been do to a major spike in my anxiety) and then it felt as if my muscles were very slowly tightening and wanting to go into a flexed position. My mother has had this problem, so I kept telling myself that it would pass and attempt to keep myself calm. Eventually after a few minutes (though time was hard to gage) I could slowly move my limbs and then the rest of my body. I lay in bed for a minute or two trying to calm myself then I looked up at the ceiling and it looked almost like there was squirming snakes/bugs in my whole field of vision. I looked to the wall and it was still there. I quickly got out of bed and tried to put on my glasses and the vision disturbance continued. I rushed out into the hall where there was some light. The vision disturbance decreased but was still kinda there. It's still partially here as I write this, around 45 minutes after the episode.

So once in the hall I rushed to the other room, turned on the light and then tried to call a friend to help talk me down. My first and second choice didn't answer, but my third did and thank god! I was having a serious panic attack that was getting worse as I couldn't get a hold of someone. I'm still a little shakey now, so I think I might go make myself a cup of hot chocolate (to help me recover from the dementors ^_^) and then watch some super happy tv until I feel I can attempt to sleep. Thank the gods that I don't have a client until 4pm tomorrow. I'll call work in the morning and tell them I'll be in for my 4 O'Clock, but not to schedule me otherwise.


I wanted to make this entry so when I got to my doctor I have an account of the events while they are fresh, as well, any recs of some HP fics that are not too fluffy, but nothing too dark!fic (which is my usual) Snarry, Drarry, Drapery are welcome!